Yesterday I was officially six weeks pregnant. This whole week thing kinda confuses me. I'm six weeks because it's been six weeks since I had my period so now I'm starting my seventh week right? Oh who knows!
I have to admit, I've spent a lot of time fighting fear these past two weeks. There is such a fine line between faith and guarding your heart. I'm trying to find it, really I am. As I was battling thoughts of miscarraige one day, I felt the Lord say,
"Jessica, the destiny of this child has already been determined. So all you have to do is rest in Me."
I keep reminding myself of that. But I battle the war between that truth and the memories of losing our last child. I keep comparing each and every little detail, convincing myself that this time it's different. And once again, I have to be reminded of the verse He gave me even before I knew I was pregnant.
"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19
I guess I'm chock full of truth to lean on. My head knows it all. . .the hard part is allowing my heart to rest on it.
And once again, I'm finding out more of what this journey is all about.
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